The urgency not only besieged me; but also its intensity surprised me. I wanted to let out a loud scream to relieve the pressure inside, but the scream jammed in the middle of my throat. I certainly had to call for help.
It was something that I needed do, one thing I really wanted be, something I had been waiting for since I was born – and it was time to say “Now or Never”.
I couldn’t live like this anymore. I needed a break if life should have any appearance – but it was a break that neither man nor the whole world could give.
My eyes closed Handcuffs – cold as ice, slowly eating into the wrist bones of my soul and spirit. Drops of sweat covered my palms and my forehead was no different.
I then looked at my legs – that Leg irons were still in place, ironically shiny and determined, proof of what I had been all these years. Oh, how I loathed the shackles!
“Oh god, I want to get out!” I finally managed to send out a scream that pierced the silence and even worried me as mine soul yearned for a breath of fresh air. Walls on all sides, menacing gorges on every step of the way, watchful predators; for me it was nothing but that Prison of life.
When I thought about my next step, I noticed that I had grown a dreadlock, the roots of which were engraved in the desert of my skull. When I continued to watch, another sprout. Soon my head was all dreadlocks, all green, oil and the power of life, so I guessed.
A whirlwind blew around me several times, lifting my chest and gasping for breath. In her trembling, my hands showed shimmering muscles, proof of new strength.
With one hand on the east wall and the other on the west wall, Samson styleI brought down my enclosure; in a mighty burst everything turned into rubles. God is able!
As I sauntered out of my rubble, my feet touched soft ground. I felt that something heavy had fallen off my shoulders. I also felt like I had jumped out of a spider web, but landed gently, if only to give me the opportunity to tell what had happened.
I put my hands up. Pure praise; the joy of the soul. What a new order of things! How high he had lifted me! I started jogging; it just had to be – for It was time.
A sweet scent of perfume filled the air; the kind that could only come from ripe flowers. A wind blew gently and hissed the leaves, my soul was happy. Sweet beak sounds penetrated my privacy. The beauty of freedom under the sun!
“I have traveled safely; A long journey through valleys and thickets, and that shows. “Words came out of my mouth. As I stood there, I made a picture of myself with my thoughts; an image that should soon be the only one of its kind.
And when I stared at the picture, a voice cut through the silence. “Is that you, Phanuel?” asked the voice with absolute and unmistakable clarity.
My ears heard another noise. Although I couldn’t say what it was, I could see the direction it was coming from.
I immediately waded through the lilies and the budding bushes, and there a small stream slid in front of me. The ease with which the water flowed, the purity and peace that existed! After spending a long time in the muddy waters of the life prison, which a people could easily define, the current brought a refreshing order.
I died of thirst; I also smelled of heavy sweat.
I stooped to drink from the stream, but something caught my eye and stopped me before I even took the first sip.
I got up quickly and gasped. What an ugly sight!
My face; I had seen my face in the water! All the time that I suffered in prison, I never had the opportunity to look at my face. I didn’t have the means either. I just imagined it.
The cracks, the folds, and the pallor that I had seen in the water surprised me. “Is that you, Phanuel?” “Oh god, I wish I wasn’t!” I cried out. “But that’s me, my God; but that can’t be me! “I added, trying to make sense of the contradiction.
It was time. I bent down again and drank with my eyes closed until I was full. After that I felt like I had become one with the stream, a constant, calm flow of amazing beauty.
Time for a full bath, a deep one! I threw away every old piece of clothing. While I was diving, water splashed violently on the edges of the stream. I spent so much time under water that I came out “wet”.
When I came out of the stream, my soul watched in amazement as the desert of my life traced its footprints back to the source.
After applying skin lotion and putting on clean, freshly squeezed clothing, I was back in front of the mirror – this time tall, confident, fearless, and ready to take on Goliath.
“Welcome, Phanuel!” The voice message had changed now.
It was the trip of a lifetime. Released from the prison of life, I stepped back from the mirror, turned and took brisk steps into my room.
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