Note from Liz: This is my first post in 8 months – the most difficult 8 months of my life. I know this for sure: God is good and never lets go. If I am faithful, he is faithful – as it says in his word – 2 Timothy 2:13. Many thanks to my friends, family and readers who encouraged and bugged me to write again. Glory to God.
Forget about the previous things; Do not linger in the past. See, I’m doing a new thing! Now it jumps up; don’t you notice i make a path in the wilderness and brooks in the desert. Isaiah 43: 18-19
Words like new beginning, a brand new page sound shiny and promising.
Hope full of excitement.
Unless sometimes a new start means that a wish has not been fulfilled.
It is an end, a tragedy.
Something that was enforced based on someone else’s decisions.
Instead of making a promise, I feel miserable.
Sad, alone and lost.
I pray and cry.
Recite Scripture and Agree with God’s Word – He never leaves or ever leaves me.
He has hope and a future, restores what grasshoppers have eaten away.
Locusts that eat everything and go.
Nothing will ever be the same.
Life torn and scattered.
How do you breathe in the thin oxygen from now and not yet?
Christian platitudes don’t help.
I need Christ.
Christ who wept over Lazarus.
Christ, whose closest friends betrayed and abandoned him.
Christ in the garden.
Christ on the cross.
Christ who loved and wept, endured and died.
Died so I could live.
Died to give new life.
A new page.
He lived it so that he could understand it.
He came to live the worst parts of life.
Because those who suffer are our greatest comfort.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of Compassion and the God of all comfort, who comfort us in all our difficulties so that we can comfort those in difficulty with the comfort we receive from God. 2 Corinthians 1: 3-4
He is El Roi – the God who sees.
El Shadid – All Sufficient.
Jehovah Rapha – the Lord who heals
Jehovah Jireh – the Lord who cares
And the God of All Grace, who after a while called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will restore you yourself and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:10
My 31 year marriage recently ended. It was an end I didn’t want.
I wanted to restore.
I wanted a miracle.
In the middle of the end it became clear to me that it would not happen and what I had hoped and prayed for would not happen.
It would be okay because God had something better.
I felt it, I knew it.
It was a new chapter in the service.
This is what the Lord meant in Joel 2:25 when he said: “So I will give you back the years that the swarming grasshopper has eaten, the crawling grasshopper and the chewing grasshopper, my large army that I have sent among you. You shall eat abundantly and be content and praise the name of the Lord your God. “
Only it didn’t happen.
I can guess and explain, but the Lord is powerful – if it is His will, the doors swing wide, but instead they slam.
Some of it was my fault.
Next, my son, whom I love with all my heart, got behavior problems.
His behavior was extreme, persistent, and refused to be corrected.
The moment came when I understood that he could no longer live with me because I was no longer able to respond in a helpful way.
He had to live with his father … in another state.
The event made me feel guilty and ashamed as I recovered from its absence.
Being a wife and mother is all I have known since I was 19.
I couldn’t think or feel.
If the floor falls out, how do you stand?
I wish I could tell you.
I can not.
There are days when I don’t want to get up – but I do.
I feel dizzy.
I worship, pray and cry out to God.
I read his word and go to church.
I love the Lord with all my heart and fight the despair that tries to take hold of him.
I can give you the right Christian answers.
But the night is still there and it’s dark.
I think tomorrow will come.
I believe that God’s promises are true.
I think he has hope and a future for me … and for you.
I know he’s good, which means his ways are good too.
I hold on to hope.
I hold on to Jesus.
He is fighting for me. His word says all I have to do is be silent and he fights for me.
He also fights for you.
You and I can have hope because He is living hope.
Whoever promised is faithful.
I don’t know what God has for me next – I’m still praying, trying to be quiet and listen.
Learning to believe does not mean that I do not experience pain, loss or loneliness. It doesn’t mean that there are no days when I’m sitting in the dark.
It means that I trust and believe no matter how I feel. He never lets go.
I belong to him and he never leaves his children.
It means that if I can’t take another step, I’ll let him carry me, knowing that he will.
He is strong in my weakness.
It is trusted that the promises are true even when there is no evidence to support them.
It believes it is good – because it is.
The Lord is good, a fortress on the day of need; He knows those who take refuge with him. Nahum 1: 7
Are you tired
Did not you hear
The Lord is the Eternal God, the creator of the ends of the earth.
He doesn’t faint or get tired.
His understanding is unsearchable.
He gives power to the powerless and he increases power to those who have no power.
He is gentle and depressed and gives my soul peace.
When I wait for the Lord, he renews my strength.
Gives me wings like eagles so that I can ascend.
And I’ll go up.
I will ascend in Jesus’ name – He makes a way in the desert and flows into the wasteland.
Glory to God.
Father God, Lord Jesus,
Thank you for who you are. Thank you for never leaving or leaving me. You know every tear and your love never fails. Thank you, Lord, for blessings and trials – I am healed by your wounds. I choose you, Lord Jesus – your will, your way. I give you my pain, my circumstances, my life. I trust that you make my way straight and dance out of grief. Give me beauty for ashes. You are good, true and I praise you both on the mountain and in the valley. My circumstances and my life may change, but you never do. Thank you for being true and true. I pray for my friends who like me and go through difficulties and insecurities. I pray that they will feel the loving arms of your consolation, mercy, and mercy as they hold out and follow you through the desert and thorn bushes. You’re worth it. I love you, Father God, I love you, Lord Jesus, Adonai, I love you, Holy Spirit – I pray in your precious name, Amen.
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