A Jewish matchmaker promotes self-growth during self-isolation
The reaction to corona pandemic and self-isolation is a complete shake up of the reality as we know it. A reality that may affect extraverts more than introverts. Introverts are used to isolating themselves. They do this regularly to recharge themselves. Extraverts require a lot of human interaction to maintain their energy and optimism, and can quickly find themselves in a state of depression if self-isolation continues for too long.
However, this article is not about how to entertain extraverts during self-isolation – although it is entertaining to get to know yourself and develop this relationship. This article is about the opportunity given to all of us to go deeper and use self-isolation as a time for self-confidence and self-growth.
It’s easy to delve into Netflix and social media. So many of us have spent our free time in front of the corona. But this is a dead end and you will feel this deadly if you spend too much time on these platforms. Instead of drawing our attention to external stimuli, I suggest that we start looking inside. I suggest that we invest much of our prescribed “free time” in self-isolation to introduce ourselves and build the kind of love relationship that we have tried for years to do through relationships with others.
What does self-growth look like during self-isolation? It could include journaling. A good place to start is to write down your feelings about everything that is going on. This is an unprecedented time in our history, and whether you acknowledge it or not, many emotions vie for your attention: fear, sadness, worry, anger. We all try to re-calibrate our emotional state after the sudden collapse of our world – in other words, “wrap our heads around it”. Recalibration is required, but does not happen by distracting your attention with shows and memes. This is only done in a healthy and effective way by turning inward, acknowledging your feelings and expressing them.
If you’re not a great journalist, take some time each day to sit quietly and have conversations with yourself. Let self-isolation be the first issue. Talk to yourself the way you would speak to a valued friend who was in need. Ask yourself, “How are you?”, “What are your concerns about this pandemic?”, “What are some of your fears?” And perhaps the most important thing: ask yourself what you can do to alleviate your own worries. Make sure that you are strong, intelligent and able to handle anything that can happen safely and that everything will be fine.
Both techniques can get the ball rolling, and once this ball rolls, conversations with you become easier and more natural. And through the conversations you learn who you are and what you think, fear and want. You will get to know it yourself and will optimally respond to yourself with compassion, empathy, and love, just as you would with this esteemed friend.
Security is not on the outside, where circumstances and events can cost a dime. There is no security in another person who could choose to end the relationship at any time. Protection and security can only be found in yourself if you fully rely on overcoming a crisis that can occur in your reality. Self-isolation can be a blessing from which you emerge whole, healed and confident. He emerges from the closed, cramped space of her cocoon like a butterfly to fly in a burst of wonderful freedom.
I send prayers of love and healing to you, my friends.
* For tips on how to love the unpleasant parts of yourself, click here.
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