I gave my life to Christ at the tender age of 5. I did it with my grandmother on our porch in Haiti. We had a member of the local church come and talk to us about the prayer of salvation. At the age of 5, God seemed like a fairy tale. Like a mystical being that you have heard in stories. In my opinion, he was a warrior, armored from head to toe – ready to fight and protect his people. This was my first idea of who God was for me. The first time I was sexually abused was at the age of 5. It was a family member. The second time was 7 years old. The following times were up to 10 years old and they were also from family members. It was normal to be touched by older men and to be committed to secrecy. It was a breeze that turned into years of pain. At 10, I tried to take my life by drinking a chemical cleaner in my bathroom. I was disturbed by my relationship with my mother. I wanted to end everything to return to her. After drinking a big gulp of cleanser and water, I gave a short prayer and asked God for forgiveness and His will to live. I remember asking him to wake me up the next morning if he wanted me to live. I woke up the next day and woke up day after day. At the age of 11, I experienced some of my darkest days as a child. I had a very rough depression and told my mother about one of my sexual abuse experiences. This day seemed to be the longest day ever. I told my mother and she did not believe me. I have lost every wish to survive this day. I prayed all night, read the Bible and cried. I knew a verse that I could read in difficult times. I had previously heard a teacher speak to a colleague at school, if you need help, read psalms 27. I may have read these psalms a hundred times that night. I pointed out a lot on verse 10 in my prayers during this dark hour that night. I knew that only God can help me. The very next day my mother called me from work and told me she believed me. That was a crucial moment in my life and my journey with God. That was my personal encounter with God, my Father, the Protector. I've spent my entire adult years recovering from my childhood and healing. I'm still on the journey, but I'm not afraid to face my past as I move forward.
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